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misswindy and deeablo, I present you with my drabble-matics!
The Battle For The Hair Gel
In the bar, Angel punched his hair gel. He had been busy with the hair gel for hours and now wanted nothing more than a drunk cuddle or a mulleted massage from his lover Lindsey.
He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his tight Lindsey appeared at the door, grinning lustfully.
"Put down the hair gel," Lindsey said wantonly. "Unless you want me to choke that hair gel on your mullet."
Angel put down the hair gel. He was stiff. He had never seen Lindsey so smokey before and it made him spiky.
Lindsey picked up the hair gel, then withdrew a boot from his forehead. "Don't be so stiff," Lindsey said with a smokey grimace. "A racoon bit my arms this morning, and everything became sticky. Now with this hair gel and this boot I can wantonly rule the world!"
Angel clutched his leathery arms angrily. This was his lover, his tight Lindsey, now staring at him with a smokey forehead.
"Fight it!" Angel shouted. "The racoon just wants the hair gel for his own tight devices! He doesn't love you, not the drunk way I do!"
Angel could see Lindsey trembling angrily. Angel reached out his mullet and touched Lindsey's forehead wantonly. He was tight, so tight, but he knew only his leathery love for Lindsey would break the racoon's spell.
Sure enough, Lindsey dropped the hair gel with a thunk. "Oh, Angel," he squealed. "I'm so drunk, can you ever forgive me?"
But Angel had already moved in the bar. Like a man waiting for a quick trick in an alley, he pressed his mullet into Lindsey's forehead. And as they fell together in a sticky fit of love, the hair gel lay on the floor, spiky and forgotten.
The Adventure Of The Dolphin
Lex and Chloe were out for a cute Valentine's walk near the phone. As they went, Chloe rested her hand on Lex's head. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so easy, Lex was filled with smoldering dread.
"Do you suppose it's sharp here?" he asked brazenly.
"You witty silly," Chloe said, tickling Lex with her car. "It's completely smarmy."
Just then, a cold dolphin leapt out from behind a purse and grabbed Chloe in the wrist. "Aaargh!" Chloe screamed.
Things looked tense. But Lex, although he was sexy, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a coffee and, like the sun gleaming over a calm ocean at daybreak, beat the dolphin honestly until it ran off. "That will teach you to grab innocent people."
Then he clasped Chloe close. Chloe was bleeding tenaciously. "My darling," Lex said, and pressed his lips to Chloe's ass.
"I love you," Chloe said carefully, and expired in Lex's arms.
Lex never loved again.
And a snippet from a different take (entitled "Sexy Love") on the Lex/Chloe story. Chloe has been lost at sea for ten years, and she finally reunites with Lex:
"My love," Chloe said honestly, "I'm sorry for the tense shock. I've been shipwrecked on a smarmy island for the last ten years, living like the sun gleaming over a calm ocean at daybreak. I was only rescued last week." She paused. "I lost my ass in the wreck. Can you still love me?"
Lex could hardly believe his Chloe had returned. "I will always love you, ass or no ass. Besides, you can cover it up with a purse."
Bwa ha ha ha ha ha! These just keep getting better and better!
A Shuttle In Time
On a dark and funny morning, Kaylee sat in the infirmary. It was Valentine's Day and she was all alone. Her cheek ached in sorrow for the secret love that she could never share. How could she expect Simon to love someone with a greasy shoulder?
Happily, she began to recite a poem she had composed. "Ah, my love is like a goofy cool wrench, all on a summer's day. I wish my Simon would squeeze me, in his own sweet way..."
"Do you?" Simon sat down beside Kaylee and put his hand on Kaylee's neck. "I think that could be arranged."
Kaylee gasped silently. "But what about my greasy shoulder?"
"I like it," Simon said carefully. "I think it's slow."
They came together and their kiss was like a meteor shooting through space, never stopping or yielding.
"I love you," Kaylee said giggly.
"I love you too," Simon replied and squeezed her.
They bought a cow, moved in together, and lived pensively ever after.
Awwwww. I swear I didn't hit "reload" over and over until I got a schmoopy one. This was the first. OTP! OTP!
misswindy and deeablo, I present you with my drabble-matics!The Battle For The Hair Gel
In the bar, Angel punched his hair gel. He had been busy with the hair gel for hours and now wanted nothing more than a drunk cuddle or a mulleted massage from his lover Lindsey.
He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his tight Lindsey appeared at the door, grinning lustfully.
"Put down the hair gel," Lindsey said wantonly. "Unless you want me to choke that hair gel on your mullet."
Angel put down the hair gel. He was stiff. He had never seen Lindsey so smokey before and it made him spiky.
Lindsey picked up the hair gel, then withdrew a boot from his forehead. "Don't be so stiff," Lindsey said with a smokey grimace. "A racoon bit my arms this morning, and everything became sticky. Now with this hair gel and this boot I can wantonly rule the world!"
Angel clutched his leathery arms angrily. This was his lover, his tight Lindsey, now staring at him with a smokey forehead.
"Fight it!" Angel shouted. "The racoon just wants the hair gel for his own tight devices! He doesn't love you, not the drunk way I do!"
Angel could see Lindsey trembling angrily. Angel reached out his mullet and touched Lindsey's forehead wantonly. He was tight, so tight, but he knew only his leathery love for Lindsey would break the racoon's spell.
Sure enough, Lindsey dropped the hair gel with a thunk. "Oh, Angel," he squealed. "I'm so drunk, can you ever forgive me?"
But Angel had already moved in the bar. Like a man waiting for a quick trick in an alley, he pressed his mullet into Lindsey's forehead. And as they fell together in a sticky fit of love, the hair gel lay on the floor, spiky and forgotten.
The Adventure Of The Dolphin
Lex and Chloe were out for a cute Valentine's walk near the phone. As they went, Chloe rested her hand on Lex's head. It was the most romantic walk ever. But even though the day was so easy, Lex was filled with smoldering dread.
"Do you suppose it's sharp here?" he asked brazenly.
"You witty silly," Chloe said, tickling Lex with her car. "It's completely smarmy."
Just then, a cold dolphin leapt out from behind a purse and grabbed Chloe in the wrist. "Aaargh!" Chloe screamed.
Things looked tense. But Lex, although he was sexy, knew he had to save his love. He grabbed a coffee and, like the sun gleaming over a calm ocean at daybreak, beat the dolphin honestly until it ran off. "That will teach you to grab innocent people."
Then he clasped Chloe close. Chloe was bleeding tenaciously. "My darling," Lex said, and pressed his lips to Chloe's ass.
"I love you," Chloe said carefully, and expired in Lex's arms.
Lex never loved again.
And a snippet from a different take (entitled "Sexy Love") on the Lex/Chloe story. Chloe has been lost at sea for ten years, and she finally reunites with Lex:
"My love," Chloe said honestly, "I'm sorry for the tense shock. I've been shipwrecked on a smarmy island for the last ten years, living like the sun gleaming over a calm ocean at daybreak. I was only rescued last week." She paused. "I lost my ass in the wreck. Can you still love me?"
Lex could hardly believe his Chloe had returned. "I will always love you, ass or no ass. Besides, you can cover it up with a purse."
Bwa ha ha ha ha ha! These just keep getting better and better!
A Shuttle In Time
On a dark and funny morning, Kaylee sat in the infirmary. It was Valentine's Day and she was all alone. Her cheek ached in sorrow for the secret love that she could never share. How could she expect Simon to love someone with a greasy shoulder?
Happily, she began to recite a poem she had composed. "Ah, my love is like a goofy cool wrench, all on a summer's day. I wish my Simon would squeeze me, in his own sweet way..."
"Do you?" Simon sat down beside Kaylee and put his hand on Kaylee's neck. "I think that could be arranged."
Kaylee gasped silently. "But what about my greasy shoulder?"
"I like it," Simon said carefully. "I think it's slow."
They came together and their kiss was like a meteor shooting through space, never stopping or yielding.
"I love you," Kaylee said giggly.
"I love you too," Simon replied and squeezed her.
They bought a cow, moved in together, and lived pensively ever after.
Awwwww. I swear I didn't hit "reload" over and over until I got a schmoopy one. This was the first. OTP! OTP!
